4-12-02
I don't think I've ever been this frightened before in my entire life...I'm just barely able to keep myself from falling apart for the twins I'm carrying...I almost lost them once, and I refuse to let that happen again...
It's just so much has been going on...between Angora's attacks, everyone getting injured and then that attack on the Asylum...all those people taken captive and getting dragged off to only gods know where...damnit...it was MY responsibility to keep them safe...since Diana's short a memory, it's all my responsibility...my fault for not planning ahead...I knew that money showing up on the doorstep was too good to be true...and of course it went to helping the people at the Asylum out, be it for medical bills or repair of the place or just general upkeep...I should have known the bastards would come back to take it again...
Now there's this talk of Klork, Syan, Mitch and Kernunose going back there to try getting them all back...I understand why they're going...hell...I want to go...but I know I can't...it just frightens me...what if something goes wrong? What if something happens to them? What if something happens to Klork? He's such a wonderful father to Brenna, I know he will be to the twins as well...if he makes it...gods...I'm freaking out again...I've got to relax...take it easy...ok...
There is some good news among the bad...Syan and Iris did escape...they're here, sleeping...and Diana actually woke up from her coma for a little while, she's just heavily drugged...the hospital has been wonderful too us...very understanding and whatnot...they've bent a lot of their rules to accomidate us and we appreciate it greatly...
Gods...poor Iris...she's getting really sick...I don't know what they did to her, but I know it was bad...I just touched her forehead and she's burning up...I'm going to see if I can't get a doctor to look at her...damnit...
This prospective partnership with Foss Associates also worries me...I mean...Jeff, the new CEO, seems on the level...and he's made some very sweet offers...one I actually took him up on, the information gathering, but I can't help thinking it's just too good to be true...I don't know...I just don't trust big bussiness...too much room for corruption, I guess...I never meant for the Asylum to turn into a bussiness, the way he seems to be looking at it as...it's a home, no matter how dangerouse it is at times...it's a home and the people who live within its walls is a family, strange as that may be...that just makes knowing that so many of them in danger so much more terrifying...great gods I hope everything turns out alright...just don't want anyone more hurt...
current mood: scared
current music: Breathing of my friends and family